Why I will never be a size 0.

My childhood was legit. Some of my best and worst memories involved food (SHOCKING, I know). There were so many of us and my badass mom used to make dinner every night. Probably because she wanted to make sure we were eating healthy, thought it was her job, but also I'm pretty sure a meal out for 7 people would have been like, $200 at McD's. Good memories though. Seven people all together at the dinner table every night. Usually Michael's legs were stretching under the table and kicking us (grrrrr) and we were constantly fighting about it. The boys in their two chairs on one side of the table and the three girls on a black bench that we had for the longest time. Sam's was a weekly stop. It's probably a sign you need to stop procreating when both the mom AND the dad have their own massive shopping cart at Sam's and they are both totally cram packed full. They used to buy these massive cans of vegetables and apple sauce from Sams -- you know? the cans that are LITERALLY 100 ounces? Sick. It's restaurant style. So many kids. For some reason, I always wanted to carry them in from the car and I ALWAYS dropped them on my foot. I'm pretty sure I had a black and blue big toe for atleast 3 years of my life. My mom used to make mac and cheese that was probably actually pretty good, but she insisted on cutting up these cubes (yes, cubes) of ham and throwin' them in there to give us "protein". Wah wah. It was sick. Meatloaf was often a staple which I still think is all kinds of disgusting and I'm not even going to discuss the meat grinder that was a staple on our countertop. *Shudder*

Not all meals were weird/gross though. My dad used to make these sick hamburgers and my mom would make chocolate shakes from none other than Blue Bell Vanilla Ice Cream (TEXAS, WHAT WHAT!!). She also makes the most insane potato salad ever and her mashed potatoes are still to this day my favorite food. Randomly, one of the best foods was Mama's Pizza. Best. Pizza. Ever. I always used to want to go with my parents to pick it up, but driving home smelling that pizza (even if it was in the truck) was the worst torture I have known to this day. We'd go home and dig the hell in. Mom and Dad would crack open their Coors Original (.....who drinks that?) and we'd call it a night.

Long story short, I drove from Uptown to Parker and Custer today to get myself a Mama's Pizza. I had completely forgotten about it, haven't thought of it in atleast 10 years and it was probably the most satisfying meal I have had in a month (except for the chicken tetrazzini my momma made

recently that was also a classic staple). If you haven't had this pizza -- go get it. The restaurant itself is slightly questionable from the outside but I promise you wont be disappointed. Go. Now. It's amazing.

**After my mom's comment I feel as though I need to add a little addition here. My mom is the shit. Most everyone reading this is one of her children so you know as well as I do -- but in case you aren't -- read carefully. My. Mom. Is. The. Shit. She really is a good cook when she doesn't try to make orange glazed ham balls (another memory I try every day to forgot). As you can see by her comments -- she as an awesome cook. Lots of good memories.